SECRET WARS: PART 1!!! – GREEKS VS. VIKINGS!!! Sunday, Jul 23 2006 

Who do you think would win  in a war between the Greeks (Bronze Age, Mycenean era) and the Vikings (Kicking all of europes ass era, sailing out to america and shit)??????????????????

Ok, heres each teams pros and cons:

Greeks:

  • Achilles (part god/immortal)
  • Pretty good sized naval fleet
  • Stronger sheilds
  • More strategic in war.

Vikings:

  • Thor (all god/ god of mother fucking THUNDER!!)
  • Faster ships
  • Culture / religion based on war & conquering
  • Chainmail
  • Weaker sheilds
  • Mother fucking brute force in war.

Who would win?!?!?!

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WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU HAD ONLY 2 WEEKS LEFT TO LIVE, AND ALL OF BILL GATES MONEY? Thursday, Jul 6 2006 

Ok, heres the scenario:

  • You will die in 2 weeks to the day.
  • You have all of Bill Gates money, which means you have unlimited resources.

Mull this one over for a moment, this is how you will celebrate the last 14 days of your life if money was no issue.

What do you do?

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WOULD YOU HANG OUT WITH YOURSELF IF YOU MET YOU?!?!? Sunday, Jul 2 2006 

Ok. Heres the question:

Do you think you’d:

  • Be your own new Best Friend Forever?

or

  • Get on your own fucking nerves cause you’d make all the same jokes??

Would you actually enjoy your own company if you met you?

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WHICH PART OF YOUR OWN BODY WOULD YOU WANT TO EAT MOST?? Thursday, Jun 29 2006 

One day, sitting at my keyboard I realized… “My fingers look delicious”. Seriously. Theres not a lot of meat on them, but I bet they’d be tasty.

Which part of your own body would you want to eat most if you weren’t you?

Heres the breakdown:

  • You can eat ANY part of your own body you would like, without pain or consequence. It’ll magically still be there when you done.
  • You can prepare yourself in any way you see fit and with any ingredients you’d like.

WHICH PART WOULD IT BE??!

WOULD YOU HAVE SEX WITH YOUR OWN CLONE?? Thursday, Jun 29 2006 

Ok, heres the breakdown:

  • Your clone exists for 1 night, and 1 night alone.
  • When you wake up in the morning, your clone will no longer exist, and no one will ever have to know.

Do you have sex with your own clone??!!

** If you say ‘No’, at least consider this…

Would you at least have a 3-some with You, your clone and someone you’ve been wanting to bone?!

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WOULD YOU KILL A NEW BORN BABY IF IT WAS… SAY… THE ANTI-CHRIST?!?!?!? Tuesday, Jun 27 2006 

Ok. Heres the scenario.

Once again, you are in the hospital on your death bed.

You only have 2 weeks left to live. In the middle of the night, a shadowy figure approaches you at your bedside.

It tells you that down the hall is the baby nursery. In the nursery the Anti-Christ was just born. If you walk down the hallway and snap that little baby’s neck, you will save millions of people from decades of death and agony..

The only catch, even though its “the” Anti-Christ, its still a baby and technically hasn’t done a damn thing to anyone… YET!

Heres the breakdown:

  • Shadowy figure is not lying.
  • Religion is moot. The term “Anti-Christ” is only used for the sake of brevity.
  • The baby IS indeed the (an?) Anti-Christ like figure. Will be Hitler x1000.
  • No one will know you murdered the baby.
  • Technically the baby hasn’t done anything yet.

WHAT DO YOU DO?!?!

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WHAT WOULD YOU DO TO BE…. IMMORTAL?! Monday, Jun 26 2006 

Ok. Heres the scenario.

Your in the hospital on your death bed. You only have 2 weeks left to live. In the middlle of the night, a shadowy figure approaches you at your bedside. It tells you that down the hall is the baby nursery. If you go into the nursery and EAT one of the newborn babies, it will grant you Immortality.

NO CATCH!

Also, every woman who gets this question doesn't trust the shadowy figure. Trust me, its on the level.

No "Oh, your immortal but in Jail for eternity", or "Your immortal, but always sick…" Bullshit.

No catch.

  • You.
  • Immortal.
  • In your prime.
  • Healthy for all eternity.

Do you eat the baby?

** Due to overwhelming responses, let me clarify that the baby can be whatever race & gender you want to make it seem more palatable. Also, yes, you CAN season it OR smother it in BBQ sauce, but the baby must be living and raw when you eat it.

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Its your last night on earth, and you can pick 5 people living OR dead to party with… Monday, Jun 26 2006 

Who do you choose, and Why?? I choose:

  • Benjamin Franklin
  • Theodore Roosevelt
  • Ernest Hemmingway
  • Abraham Lincoln
  • Janis Joplin

Why?

  • Benjamin Franklin was a big Poon hound back in his day. He’d be  good wingman.
  • I’d crack up all night listening to TR say ‘Bully!’ over and over.
  • Hemmingway was a drunk and manic depressive, which means he’d probably get in a bar fight.
  • Lincoln is one tall mother fucker and probably has good reach in a fight.
  • and Janis. Janis just seems like she could drink all those other pussys under the table… except for maybe Benjamin Franklin, and he’s a poon hound, so might even get in there!

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